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修改信~ RE：【昨天买东西被歧视了，用英语写了封信投诉，请大家帮忙改一下 】
此文章由 橙子橙子橙子 原创或转贴，不代表本站立场和观点，版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 橙子橙子橙子 所有！转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明，并保持内容完整
本帖最后由 橙子橙子橙子 于 2014-7-4 17:18 编辑
在保留楼主原有信件的措辞基础上，闲的无聊，给你修改了一下，主要是你那些英语用词和语法错误看着难受，职业病。
楼主你得给我加分。。。。
A bad experience in the 8 porter avenue op shop (experience这里是不可数名词，不能说 A，改为my 比较合理。in 改为 at)
At about 1:15 o’clock pm （都1：15了就不用再 o'clock了） on the 3rd of July, I went to （the）First Options Op Shop in the （in the 改为 at，当你提及地址的时候） 8 Porter Avenue. I found a set of five chops （5双筷子应该是 5 sets of chopsticks） and then I asked for the price, the lady was very nice, she told me the clothing wrapped the chops looked dirty （筷子不穿衣服，clothing 应改为 cloth，wrapped 后面加 around）, she let me pay 2dollars and the set of chops should be six chops （表达不清，根据你的意思，应该是 she let me know that it was supposed to be 6 sets of chopsticks instead of 5 and I could pay $2 for the whole thing）. So I went back to find another chops (another chops 应该是 the 6th pair) and at the same time, I found some plate clothing （cloth） that matched the chops （chopsticks）. When I returned to the front desk, the casher （收银员是 cashier，casher是法语，maybe你这里是英法混搭。。。） was changed into another old lady （was a different lady就可以了，这个old lady 不是刚才那个lady变的，所以不能用change）. I enquired the price including plate clothing and chops （the price for the plate cloth and the chopsticks）. The old （old 可以改 second，这样2个lady就分开了） lady said 4 dollars （all） together. I thought it’s a little bit expensive compared with （with 改为to） chops （the chopsticks）, so I discussed with my friends if I should buy these （the） plate clothing （cloth） or not. The old （second） lady suddenly became very impatient, she began to knock the glass of the counter for seconds, and then she shouted to me: “put them back”. I returned these goods back （return就已经是put back了，这里不用再说back了）and told her she was impatient. She shouted:”maybe you used to bargain in your country, but not in here”, then she went quickly to the back of the shop. Yes, I often buy some things in this shop and know the price is cheap, but if I have no rights to discuss with my friends （逻辑好混乱，大概是当时被那个 bitch 气晕了吧，那就改成 Yes, I often buy things in this shop and I know the price is not as high however I still have the rights to discuss it with my friends）. Actually, I never asked for the lower price. Or she is a racist, with prejudice to different skin people, especially when she said “in your country” these words (楼主再次语无伦次，好吧，别直接说人家是个racist, 说 I felt extremely offended and upset about her words like ‘in your country…’ and I think she was being discriminative against people from other countries). I know the shop is （a）charity shop and belong（belongs） to Uniting Care church. I also went to church, every people is very nice （every people，这个搭配无力吐槽了，改成I am a member of the church where everyone is very friendly）. I think the old （second）lady’s gesture didn’t match the meaning of words “charity”, “church”, and “volunteer”. She made these words dirty! （楼主啊楼主，这最后两句真的是太大道理了，都可以跟“这种行为和共产党员的光辉形象一点都不相称”媲美了。建议改成 I feel very disappointed that I have been treated this way and I would like to request a follow-up with this incident. 因为你写这封信当然想是得到一个回复，bitching 了半天，连这点都忘了，还好我给你想到了。）
I hope nobody will go through it like me. (这个就不要说了吧，everybody 没那么容易 go through 你 go through 的这些 drama。。。。)
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PWC CAP作业奉上！ (2009-5-13) 米克羊 
楼主:糖葫芦小姐
发表于 2014-7-4 18:08
