刚刚在whirlpool被人说帖子not readable，我英语真那么差？

强8

这点儿P事情来足迹说不就行了，还去Whirlpool，拽英文？

想起My Kitchen Rule里面评委对于印度姐妹甜点的评价：edible.

jerryclark

zn7726 发表于 2013-2-12 09:12
看106楼

LZ把故事讲完了，下面没有了。

你的贴子后面还有一段

Sorry for the longwinded story but I just wanted to get this off my chest before I put in the formal complaint or speak directly with the owner. I’m also interested to know what others out there in my position would demand to compensate them for the lack of professionalism, inconvenience and time wastage?

这个人家看了就知道LZ想表达什么了。我通篇只看第一段和最后一段。呵呵

goodayaus

zn7726 发表于 2013-2-12 10:08
看#106楼

That doesn't mean anything. Who said all locals can write proper English?  Just like we Chinese, does every one has the same ability of making a point or telling a story in Chinese?  Have you heard about some training called "Business Writing"? IYou and LZ should go get some of those lessons, I reckon.

zdb97

a1169377 发表于 2013-2-11 14:26
We had a billing error 8 months ago with vodafone. They mis-calculated my bill and over- charged $ ...

感觉也不是啰嗦的问题，有些啰嗦让人还是读的有意思的。语法是有点问题，但也没影响理解。鬼常常口语的语法也不严谨。
说Not readable有点不礼貌，但大概明白读的人的意思。就是觉得我们不这么说，这么讲很怪的感觉。
我想到自己当年雅思作文7分过来以为英语不说好起码不会让别人不懂，结果刚开始写第一个小论文老师直接给我不及格，理由就是读不懂，太啰嗦！当时被打击的。。。后来慢慢体会，写作的一点，当词汇表达达不到精当的时候更要朴素的表达结构，避免从句。不过就是个过程，看别人写的东西多了，自己写多了，感觉慢慢就出来了。

ningjacky

ilovefamily 发表于 2013-2-12 09:23
这个帖子，我居然从头到尾读完了。。。。。。。。。。
尤其最后一句，Sorry for the longwinded story bu ...

啊？ 这个可以回来退啊？

zn7726

goodayaus 发表于 2013-2-12 13:32
That doesn't mean anything. Who said all locals can write proper English?  Just like we Chinese,  ...

你说的有道理, 要不我给你我引用的帖子的地址, 你上去教训人家 "不够cut to the chase, 太啰嗦" ?

希望你多给LZ改改错误, 显而易见的语法错误, 更local的表达方式.

cindyyanjie

看懂

ilovefamily

ningjacky 发表于 2013-2-12 13:35
啊？ 这个可以回来退啊？

澳洲是会哭的孩子有奶吃。。。。。。。。。。。
都说不行，可是就看你怎么argue了。。。。。。。。
反正我们这个case是成功了。。。。。。。。。。。
上周钱就入账了。。。。。。。。。happy！！！！！！！！！！！

ningjacky

ilovefamily 发表于 2013-2-12 12:39
澳洲是会哭的孩子有奶吃。。。。。。。。。。。
都说不行，可是就看你怎么argue了。。。。。。。。
反正 ...

厉害厉害。。。说人多还是说他们不给退？
我们上次可以推1000块的首饰，他们就不给推，说如果带回澳洲就不给推

a1169377

zn7726 发表于 2013-2-12 13:36
你说的有道理, 要不我给你我引用的帖子的地址, 你上去教训人家 "不够cut to the chase, 太啰嗦" ?

希望 ...

俺从小就语文不好，老妈说我这孩子的思维跟别人都不一样，可是我也不是故意的呀。。。我就想大家给点意见，让我怎么在语言表达能力上更好，英文更local一些，没想到真成欢乐贴了

ilovefamily

ningjacky 发表于 2013-2-12 13:45
厉害厉害。。。说人多还是说他们不给退？
我们上次可以推1000块的首饰，他们就不给推，说如果带回澳洲就 ...

说啥都不管事，因为你吧boarding pass传给他们，他们一查就知道你是几点check in，几点过海关
如果真是自己晚到，一点借口都没有。。。。。。。。
一条条都给你列出来，show给你看，都是你的错，你来太晚了，精确到秒。。。。。。。。。。
反正我们这个case就是这样。。。。当时看的我自惭形秽啊，，，确实是因为自己太晚到机场造成的。。。。。。

我们回澳洲就问，机场海关的人说不行，问了好几个，都说不行。。。。。。。。。
我们不服，托我退税的朋友就给trs打电话，然后人家让给点证据写点经过看看
她就在我口述下写了满满一篇a4纸，主要是说我们经常出境旅游，每年都出境旅游，每年都给国内亲戚买好多礼物，消费好多东西在澳洲。。。。。。。。你懂的，就是说你是特能花钱的有价值的乘客。。。。。。。。然后后面再一堆拜年话，什么trs工作人员圣诞辛苦啊，圣诞还坚持上班啊之类的。。。。。。。。。

然后就给退了。。。。。。。。。。

andre1019

看不懂的都在装，或者根本没细心读。都是生活上的一些遭遇，又不是学术问题。

zn7726

andre1019 发表于 2013-2-12 14:23
看不懂的都在装，或者根本没细心读。都是生活上的一些遭遇，又不是学术问题。 ...

没错, 我早就说过了.

不过有几个给提建议和帮着改写的, 都是好同学!

ilovefamily

andre1019 发表于 2013-2-12 14:23
看不懂的都在装，或者根本没细心读。都是生活上的一些遭遇，又不是学术问题。 ...

没说看不懂，就是说写的让人没耐心看下去。。。。。。。。。

goodayaus

zn7726 发表于 2013-2-12 13:36
你说的有道理, 要不我给你我引用的帖子的地址, 你上去教训人家 "不够cut to the chase, 太啰嗦" ?

希望 ...

可以啊，我就上去写上个“not readable” 帮ＬＺ解解气，行不？反正这也不是我第一次这样做了，呵呵！ ＬＺ有自知之明来这里问，我就凑个热闹，爱听不听。我就一路人要飘过......

爱八卦

有些人就是装学问 别在意

sche7172

不是英语问题，只是楼主有当唐僧的潜质
性格不同，楼主不用理他们

逍遥骁勇

比我写得好！

绿叶小姐

能懂  但是毛病和我一样。。。不太会用连词，一天到晚 and。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

molly3144

太罗嗦了.而且重点是什么? dont use vodafone??

flylobster

whirpool是什么？

tramplady

i thought it is not legible?

daisystar88

我帮楼主改写了一下，发现很像新概念英语里面的小故事：

楼主写的：We had a billing error 8 months ago with vodafone. They mis-calculated my bill and over- charged $170 on it. We called the customer service countless times in order to solve the issue. They said they corrected the bills and  refunded the money back into my account on a specific date and retained a receipt for the refund. But there was no such refund shown on my bank statement. Last time when we rang was about 1 month ago. We told them that we would like to get a formal complaint reference number in order to fill out the TIO complaint form and they insisted to help again. After 15min on hold, the guy said they didn't refund because of a wrong account information. then my hubbie asked them why they didnt have any issue taking money out of my account but putting money in, which doesnt make any sense.

我写的：Vodafone overcharged $170 on my bill. I called up the Vodafone service. They explained that the error has been corrected, and the $170 would be refunded to my bank account in due course. For months, no bank record has since shown the occurrence of such a refund. So I rang up the Vodafone service again and asked for an explanation. They explained that the $170 refund failed to flow through，as the bank account itself is invalid. I said ‘How come this invalid bank account is able to process outflows but not inflows?’

但楼主，我在改写过程中发现，本来你处理这个问题的方式就不太对头吗，怪不得别人无法给你建议了。

楼主英文底子不差，只是还需提高。我记得我以前也有过一个很罗嗦的阶段，后来多看New Yorker之类的杂志，就好了。其实写得精练，是最难的。

juejing123

。。。看着好好玩。

小船16

比我好很多很多

ylbeethoven

其实写得很清楚了。
如果断句更明确可能好一些？
()补充，[]删除，/我习惯用的单词
我试一下能否改一下，让本文令人看得更明白。

We had a billing error (with vodafone) 8 months ago

They mis-calculated my bill and over- charged (me) $170 [on it].

We called the customer service countless times/many times in order to solve the issue/problem. They said they （had) corrected the bills and  (the money had been refunded already). They said they retained a receipt for the refund as well.

(However), there was no such refund shown on my bank statement (ever since that call).

(The last time we rang them was about a month ago.) We told them [that] we would like to get/have a formal complaint reference number in order to fill out the TIO complaint form (but) they insisted to help (us) again. After 15min(s) (wating), the guy said they didn't refund because of a wrong account information.

(then my hubbie asked them why they didnt have any issue taking money out of my account but putting money in, which doesnt make any sense.)

这句话我看了两遍才看明白……

Then my husband asked them if the account information was wrong, why could they charge us?
我个人觉得不需要说为什么可以收费但是不可以退款如果detail不对……

好吧，其实都看得懂，我英语也很差，班门弄斧了……

见谅见谅

ylbeethoven

flylobster 发表于 2013-2-18 15:47
whirpool是什么？

whirpool是一个特别牛逼得论坛。

我每次关于网上购物方面的，或者是ISP方面的problem没人理我我就上去发贴complaint，一般都有回音。

记得有一次买主板，也是很长时间不发货，我上去发帖没多久当晚该公司的经理竟然打电话给我跟我道歉，然后直接发express给我……

pangpangxie

a1169377 发表于 2013-2-11 14:50
好吧我再改改试试：
vodafail is shit, they stuffed up my bills. They promised to correct my bills n l ...

你太有才了

pangpangxie

ylbeethoven 发表于 2013-3-1 10:05
whirpool是一个特别牛逼得论坛。

我每次关于网上购物方面的，或者是ISP方面的problem没人理我我就上去发 ...

感觉你把它当成消费者协会来投诉了

远东力量

不必挂怀，说你英语差的那个人未必英语有你好， 万一电脑那头坐条狗，随便踩错了键盘，你说你气得多不值当阿？