学英语，笑话？！

小岩石头

bigcrow 发表于 2016-8-18 18:15
A customer ordered a cup of coffee in a restaurant! The waiter served the coffee. The customer found ...

真是碰上个奇葩服务生！

小岩石头

bigcrow 发表于 2016-8-20 10:37
以下一则，曾经见过中文版本的。
What Is Politics?
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is pol ...

  Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now."

The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep poo."

xiaobaoluo

也来参与一句；迈小步，不停步，天天有进步。
Little step, don't stop, Everyday progress.

xiaobaoluo

bigcrow 发表于 2016-7-31 11:00
（一）
Q: Why does a flamingo lift up one leg?
A: Because if it lifted both legs it would fall over ...

希望配上中文，可以让我们参与并学习。

bigcrow

xiaobaoluo 发表于 2016-8-21 07:34
希望配上中文，可以让我们参与并学习。

非不想也，实不敢也。其实在看这些个笑话的时候，也一直在肚皮里尝试配上中文。笑话的笑点也许就在一二个词上，一对应不上，笑点就跑偏了，或是跑没了。看英文的时候还能一丝笑，翻译之后，真怕是老虎钳子也拉不出笑来了。所以随意看看好了。
结束本贴前，就挑一则容易一点的，好丑一试。然后，闭门造车一年，看有否长进。

bigcrow

Mona has a beautiful and naughty daughter called Sona. She is very naughty and mischievous. One day, the little Sona with great curiosity asked her mom, ‘Mamma why your hair is turning grey? I don’t like it.’
Mona decided to teach her child about good behaviour and replied, ‘Dear, my hair is turning grey only because of you. Whenever you do any bad action, one of my hairs will turn grey.’
Sona was thinking for a while in silent and laughed loudly. Mom asked, what happened?
Sona replied, ‘Momma now I understand why grandma’s hair is completely grey!’

莫娜有个女儿叫索娜，漂亮而又淘气。她就是一个淘气鬼灵精。有一天，小索娜很好奇的问她妈妈，“妈妈，你的头发怎么变白了？我不喜欢白头发。”
莫娜想借此对她进行德行教育，说：“亲爱的，我的头发变白，全是因为你呀。你每做错一件事，我的头发都要变白。”
索娜默然地思索了好一会，突然大笑起来。妈妈问道，你怎么了？
索娜回答说：“妈妈，我现在明白了为什么姥姥的头发全白了。”

tina50

bigcrow 发表于 2016-8-21 20:58
Mona has a beautiful and naughty daughter called Sona. She is very naughty and mischievous. One day, ...

哈哈。。。

tina50

bigcrow 发表于 2016-8-21 20:56
非不想也，实不敢也。其实在看这些个笑话的时候，也一直在肚皮里尝试配上中文。笑话的笑点也许就在一二个 ...

谦虚，太谦虚！
楼主功底深厚扎实，中文翻译，简直就是小菜一碟，请多分享！

robert123

小岩石头

不好意思发错啦！

tina50

给楼主添砖加瓦，我凑一个：
A holiday from school
Tommy hated school and was always looking for excuses not to go.
If he sneezed, he. Asked his mother to write a note saying he had a cold.
If he had a headache, he asked his mother to take him to the doctor during school hours.
He spent more time at home than he did at school.
On the days that he did go to school, he looked for excuses to come home early.

One day he came home from school in the middle of the morning.
His father was surprised.
"You're home early," he said. "Is the school closed today?"
"No,Dad," Tommy Said. "It's open. I came home early."
"How did you do that?" his father asked him. "What did you say to the teacher?"
"I told her that I had a new baby brother and that I had to come home and help you."
"But your mother has had twins," his father said, "a boy and a girl. You've got a baby brother and a baby sister."
"Yes, I know, Dad," Tommy said. "I'm saving up my baby sister to next week."