Unfair treatment in selective school (update final result)

limit-2010

原帖由 acoke 于 2012-2-3 21:06 发表

说实话，就这么点math，又同一selective学校，仅不同班而已，不会对人生未来产生任何影响，而且这分班是年年搞的。成绩好，下一次不就又分回去了吗。

从你的口气中，这事在你们似乎是天大的事情，好像人生就系于此。这样看待，反而成不小的问题，尤其对于你女儿。

我儿子才刚小学6年级，被冤枉，被忽略，甚至被无辜惩罚的多得是。我总尽力引导告诉他，世界上不公平的事情太多了。学校里轮上倒霉事情时，总设法教他自己去解决。他果然从中成长起来，学校里基本全是自己处理，甚至自己会去找副校长谈。

话说中国的副校长都不在学校。。。

缓缓

admin error - no big deal
"go away" - big deal. 支持LZ讨公道

limit-2010

原帖由 D妈妈 于 2012-2-3 21:27 发表
admin error - no big deal
"go away" - big deal. 支持LZ讨公道

应该想他/她的上级反映一下， 校长不讲理都可以投诉校长的

不过要看讲那句话当时的情景了

ilikechina

看到一个和大家都相反的意见，确实觉得很新颖，的确是我自己没有想到的观点，值得思考。。。

Share88

I met the maths head teacher. To be honest, I don't think he is a nice teacher.

cynthia

现在孩子已经UPSET了，当然应该到学校去要个说法。
即使是最后还是在CLASS5,也应该搞清楚到底是什么问题。
现在感觉学校里确实有很多不公平的地方，有的可以不计较，有的还是要SPEAK UP的。

cynthia

原帖由 D妈妈 于 2012-2-3 21:27 发表
admin error - no big deal
"go away" - big deal. 支持LZ讨公道

老师跟孩子说 GO AWAY 怎么都不对吧，也太粗鲁了。

Share88

It is not that easy to calm down. In today's math class, my daughter was taught something she learned in term 3 last year. She told the maths teacher she had learned it before. So the maths teacher gave her a new maths book and asked her to learn ahead by herself.

limit-2010

原帖由 Share88 于 2012-2-3 21:35 发表
It is not that easy to calm down. In today's math class, my daughter was taught something she learned in term 3 last year. She told the maths teacher she had learned it before. So the maths teacher ga ...

当局者迷

我说‘理解万岁’是有原因的...

lovefenger

再约校长谈吧，不论结果态度很重要，老师这样的回复太没责任心了。
另外每个人的性格和能力优势都不尽相同。
有人也许很早就什么事情自己处理，但并不代表别人也一定这么早
才代表成长。
而且楼主的女儿也已经去找过老师了，作为一个孩子寻求帮助很正常。
如果楼主希望她更独立，就建议帮助女儿去解决问题。
关键要让她继续乐观，不要用别人的错误惩罚自己。
虽然在一个低点的班，也可以证明自己是优秀的，可以更好。
期待你的好消息。

Share88

Thanks for your reply. I will tell her what you said."不要用别人的错误惩罚自己"

lovefenger

嘿嘿

红色

这到底是中国还是澳洲啊。。。
澳洲也有这么复杂的学校么。

rainmum

Ｍｙ　ｓｏｎ, whom I talked to about this situation, replied:

Being a year 8 in another selective school myself, i understand what your daughter is going through. I think you should continue to reason with the school. However, do not over- exaggerate or the teachers may have a bad impression on your daughter. If this does not work, then aim to get a good report so you may try out for a selective school such as North Sydney Girls etc. Also, if the computers really did get a glitch and mix up the two names, then the girl in class 2 will soon be unable to cope with the set task and/or fail tests which will make the maths teachers realize the mistake they've made. Always remember to strive for the best no matter what class your daughter is in and hopefully, this problematic situation can be resolved. Good luck and all the best!

Share88

Thanks for you and your son.
I have told my daughter not to expect much change. Also told her to study hard and try to move up next year.

tyxzh

老师的态度实在有问题，支持楼主

同样希望看见楼主女儿不要被这个事情影响，明年通过自己的努力move up

acoke

看见标题很大，一读是分错班的故事，没细读。脑筋里就直接想，这种事情，孩子自己应该可以摆平了。摆平，是指孩子自己设法去更正，搞不定，就只有自己deal with it了。

儿子六年级一开学，就有不爽的事情。其中一个确实对儿子不公平。听着有些恼火。儿子当时就和涉及老师交涉，被告知:"just deal with it!". 在家里说到了这事，就告诉儿子再去试，也算是去登记一下抗议。儿子说没用， 但第二天还是多次去找老师说，最后被警告，若再提这事，就立刻送去detention。这事算告终。回家后，听了这些，摸儿子头，说为他骄傲，因为他在最初交涉后，知道再交涉也没有用，但还是继续去交涉，直到撞墙。

儿子进入小学高年级，许多老师最谆谆教导的话好像就这一句: just deal with it. 我觉得，也许这是儿子在公立小学受到的最好最现实的教育，超过OC和selective本身。

不管起因是什么，Head math teacher 对孩子说go away，确实极其rude，尤其是对女孩子。这件事在你女儿，估计一辈子不会忘记。但对于你女儿，是一个通常没有的反面教育机会。你若满腔义愤去为她不平和交涉，无助于她。知道有老师不但不负责而且可能粗鲁无礼，学会如何deal with  it，是一年的math， 3个chapter换不来的。所以，我觉得，你处理得当，一次不幸的倒霉反倒可以变成一次好的机会。

你女儿居然会被如此分错班，想来在math老师里，从没被注意到过。现在去5班，老师注意她了，在我看，反而比在2班做invisible多数要强。而且老师给她书让自己学，这岂不是更好更有效率？我不相信2班和5班的老师水平有区别。1班老师可能会选最有经验或特色的老师，其他班都一样。

刚才问儿子，若遇到很不公平的事情，老师只让just deal with it，你如何办。儿子说“I'll let go if I can. If I can't, I'll take it out with the guy." 我说是老师，不是小朋友，不公平而且很rude。儿子说，“Oh， what can you do about the teacher? I think I'll just have to deal with it.". 我为儿子这种境界骄傲。

说这么多，是希望给你另外一个角度看这个事情。

[ 本帖最后由 acoke 于 2012-2-4 11:14 编辑 ]

Share88

Before I went to see the head math teacher, I already told her not to expect much change. I said I just try to find an explanation for you. So when the head math teacher told me how he sorted classes, I only asked if she will have chance to move up when she is doing well and thanked for his time. I passed the info to my daughter. But my daughter pointed out all her math tests were not bad. That's why she tried to get math score from previous math teacher and went to see the math head teacher again. But she didn't point out to the head teacher there is another student in class 2 has the same first name with her. The math head teacher palmed her away again.

I agree what you said she is not top student. The math head teacher has never taught her. He is the math teacher of class 1 only. But her previous teacher didn't want make comments as sorting class is not his job.Though he said to my daughter mixing up two of them is possible, as he did that before.  
If my daughter is not confident she got better marks comparing to the other girl with the same name, we will just deal with it.
Anyway, I am waiting for the reply from the head math teacher for my email. We only need a proper explanation to convince my daughter.  That's it.

limit-2010

原帖由 rainmum 于 2012-2-3 23:19 发表
Ｍｙ　ｓｏｎ, whom I talked to about this situation, replied:

Being a year 8 in another selective school myself, i understand what your daughter is going through. I think you should continue to reason with the school. However, do not over- exaggerate or the teachers may have a bad impression on your daughter. If this does not work, then aim to get a good report so you may try out for a selective school such as North Sydney Girls etc. Also, if the computers really did get a glitch and mix up the two names, then the girl in class 2 will soon be unable to cope with the set task and/or fail tests which will make the maths teachers realize the mistake they've made. Always remember to strive for the best no matter what class your daughter is in and hopefully, this problematic situation can be resolved. Good luck and all the best!

+1

stockton

刚读了这个帖子，有一点疑问：
数学分班通常在10年级开始的时候（JR规则），1,2,3,4,5个班，如果一个同学掉班（placement test)，应该有序的从2到3, 3到4，等等。。。。突然从2到5，个人感觉有点惩罚的味道？

lz所说的多次小测试，个人理解应该是每1-2个月进行的topic test, 每一次的成绩都会记录进入电脑的，最后的分班成绩是很多次成绩百分比的结果，1次2次出错可以，次次出错---很不容易

2个方案供参考：

Share88

The head teacher said he just moved them to the smallest class.
I went to see my daughter's math teacher last year. It seems he only recorded in a book manually. I am not sure if he then recorded in the computer or not.

[ 本帖最后由 Share88 于 2012-2-4 16:52 编辑 ]

江北

关注这件事情。如果真的被不公平对待，确实需要反抗的。不哭的孩子没奶吃！

stockton

Sorry.
2个方案供参考：
1. 大事化小小事化了。这个方案的最佳时机应该是你女儿发现错误的第一时间，由你女儿直接talk to the head teacher. 在收到‘go away' 后，立即去找执行校长报告， 要求解决，绝不过夜，最后结果，要么是你女儿“搞错了”，要么是head teacher“搞错了”，谈不上 ‘mistake'.
要知道同学有权见执行校长说明情况的（不像天朝），国人性格中的隐忍是不太提倡的。

是把刷子

把事情搞大，找学校welfare coordinator, depression 的话预约学校councellor, 直接找校长, 告诉你女儿有冤要申

stockton

2. 把事情搞大。这个方案比较适合lz现在的情况：不写邮件，不见head teacher，直接去admin, make apointment 要求执行校长谈话，附上一个formal letter.  可能的2个结果：
   A, 你女儿错了。但你搞清了原因。你和你女儿去道歉。。。
   B, head teacher错了. 你女儿回到2班，但关系很僵，没办法，这是代价。head teacher不会把你女儿怎样的，甚至从此恭敬了也说不定。

stockton

47# acoke: 高见！
尤其作为男人，放在大的世界观上从容处之，
不失为一种态度，一种风范。

Luckypeanut

其实我最担心的是，你女儿现在回到了2班， 明年如果去了1班怎么办

gdg

从一个教师的角度说几句：
1。家长要了解自己的权力；
2。换一个角度想，可能换班的原因是其他的，成绩是拿得出台面的理由。

limit-2010

原帖由 gdg 于 2012-2-4 18:41 发表
从一个教师的角度说几句：
1。家长要了解自己的权力；
2。换一个角度想，可能换班的原因是其他的，成绩是拿得出台面的理由。

澳洲也这么复杂？
(monkey28)

看来还是火星适合我。。。

freshsalads

要是我的话，我不会再写信给这个数学老师，直接汇报到校长，要一个说法。 第一，要求调查孩子的分数到底如何，第二，就对孩子和老师，老师的态度恶劣的事complain.   如果结果出来后，是孩子被委屈了，要求回原班。