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[原创作品] 英文小说:A Shadow in Surfers Paradise (75)天堂之影 - 完 [复制链接]

发表于 2014-12-8 22:05 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 何木 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 何木 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
Chapter 75         1/2


  
               
He woke up with a fever. He had caught a cold. He was weak and feeble. Vivian would come to him the day after tomorrow, but now he was sick! And from experience it would take at least seven days for him to get well.

Hah, this was embarrassing.

But he had to try. He must drink a lot of water to assist his immune system to fight the virus.

So during the day he boiled many kettles of water, and stayed many hours in bed. He applied his mental power, focusing his mind to kill the virus, and the effect had been amazing. By the next morning his fever was gone.  

Hah, how happy was he.   

Of course for the rest of the day he ought to be cautious, with utmost discretion not to offend the sky, the rain, the garden, the building, anything that appeared more powerful than him. And after promising himself he would walk slowly to save his energy, he decided to pay a visit to the bund.  

Just coming out of the subway station, there was a beggar in the way. His face was mature, but his legs, crippled, were unnaturally thin and short. He crawled on the ground, one hand gripping a bowl. Bing, not prepared to give him any money, decided to steer clear of him. But for a moment the man looked up at him, with a pair of angry eyes as if he were somehow confronted. Bing was shocked, shuddered and briskly walked away.

On the bund, tourists were excited, with mobiles or cameras becoming their third hands. The clock on the tower of a building struck the time, together with a song of Oriental Redness – ‘Oriental redness, where the sun rises; out of China Mao Ze Dong emerges…’

He sat on a bench. The breeze was cool. He lay on his back, pondering the greyish sky. A security guard came and said he was not allowed to lie on the bench. So Bing sat up, he was humble. He didn’t like any uniform, unless it was worn by his sister, or stewardesses.     

Indeed the legs of the Oriental Pearl Tower looked unsymmetrical, at least viewed from certain standpoints. Well, there must have been a reason, he thought, as he left the bund and began to stroll along Nanjing Pedestrians Road, where the people walked in leisure, like the lazy water in a river. Then he heard music from a saxophone, played by a man dressed in suit and tie, standing on the balcony of a grand building. It was a waltz; some strollers began to dance, on the neat and grand marble surface. Their faces were festively happy; the women’s waists were touched by the men’s gentle hands.

Needless to say, the onlookers, to whom Bing belonged, outnumbered the dancers. And due to the crowd, the dancers could only take little steps, round and round on the same spot, so that Bing was able to hear an Asian man and a Caucasian woman speaking in English.  

‘Where are you from?’ the man asked.

‘The US,’ said the lady, about sixty.

The man, in sunglasses and with a stiff white collar, said, ‘Oh, I am from Shanghai,’ and made a comment, ‘the music is very good.’

‘Yes, indeed,’ she smiled, who had to push up her handbag as frequently as it slipped from her shoulder. ‘Does this happen very often?’

‘Pardon?’The man lowered his head.

‘I mean do the music and dance often take place here?’

‘Oh, I see,’ the man said, missing the point, and asked, ‘do you come here to visit Shanghai?’

‘Yes, Shanghai is my first stop.’

‘Oh, that is very good.’

The music was at its last note, but the man seemed reluctant in releasing her. ‘Thank you very much, enjoy your stay in Shanghai.’

‘Thank you, thank you,’ the lady said cheerfully.

She was leaving, when the next song began and she was asked by another man, ‘Madam, can we dance?’

The lady hesitated, but she smiled.

‘Come, come, enjoy life,’ the man said, widely spreading his hands. ‘Good music, let’s enjoy life.’

So the lady shifted her bag to her shoulder again and accepted his invitation.  

‘The music is very good,’ said the man. ‘Where are you from?’

‘The US.’

‘Do you often visit China?’

‘Not really, this is my first time,’ the lady said amiably, ‘I have been busy looking after my kids.’

‘Pardon?’

‘I mean I have three children.’

‘Oh, that is too many. We have just one in China.’

‘Yes, they have kept me very busy.’

‘Yes,’ said the man, straightening his back. ‘Where is your husband? Has he come with you?’

‘My husband? He died last year.’

‘Oh…’

From then on till the end of the music, the man said no more. The lady left; her tall figure lost in the stream of neon lights and people.

Next morning he stayed in the hotel waiting for Vivian. The flight he had booked for her would arrive at 11:20am. He had also offered to pick her up at the airport, but she said she wasn’t a child and would go directly by herself to his hotel.

So he was on the bed, allowing his sexual drive come and go in cycles. He took a shower and ate breakfast, expecting Vivian would be in his arms about 12pm.

Then he thought he heard a knock at the door. He bounced off the bed, opened the door and found only a room attendant smiling at him. ‘Sorry to disturb, I thought you were out,’ she said, ‘I will clean your room later.’

‘Thank you, but I may stay inside the room for the rest of the day, maybe leave it until tomorrow?’

‘Okay, thank you,’ she said, pushing the cart away.

Not long afterwards there was another knock on the door that opened and closed again. He pulled her in. She dropped her luggage onto the floor. Her lips and her breasts were soft. His hands trembled under her clothes.

‘Let me take a shower first,’ she panted, now on the bed. ‘I feel sticky.’

‘I want to shower with you,’ he said.

‘Haven’t you already done that?’

‘Yes, but I want to shower with you.’

‘Haha.’

So with his hands he brushed the shower gel on her, and with his body he mopped hers, and with his tongue he licked her clitoris. And it didn’t take a while before she lost control of her voice, to groan, and sigh and even scream.   

‘Ah,’ she said, ‘but, no, no, don’t,’ she pull away his penis, ‘I am having my period.’

‘What?’

‘It just came the other day,’ she said, stroking it. ‘Don’t know why this month came earlier.’

‘Because you have missed me so much,’ he said, thrusting his tongue into her mouth, where it twisted a while. ‘Because you have missed so much a peasant lad?’

‘Yes, a conceited lad, an Australian village lad.’

‘So what could I do with it?’

She whispered, ‘This is the price you have to pay, for not informing me in advance of your trip.’

But he didn’t mind her words. He pressed her shoulder, pushed her head down.

She fingered it, before she took it.

This was unimaginable.

Combing her hair and ears, he asked, ‘Vivian, can we live like this forever?’

But her mouth, fully engaged, couldn’t reply. Her nose was sharper, and her eyes became slanted because of the job.  

‘Take a rest,’ he said, gently pushing her head away. She got up; he looked into her eyes. ‘Vivian, I love you,’ he said in a tone that was suddenly turned serious

‘I love you too, Bing,’ she whispered, leaning her face on his chest, her breasts soothing his ribs. He remembered she had once comforted him like this before, on the day when his friend Kang departed from him.

They were quiet. She understood him; she understood his humbleness, his vanity, and his impulses. So when he began to sob, she was not surprised. She kissed him, cupped his cheeks, until his emotion flooded back to his loins.

He dried her, then dried himself. He led her out of the bathroom, onto the bed, where he loved her, entered her. He knew she wanted him, and couldn’t refuse him.

‘Vivian,’ he said.

‘Eh?’

‘Can we live like this forever?’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes.’

‘Are you sure you won’t be tired with me,’ she said. ‘Never?’

‘Yes.’

Then suddenly her body began to wriggle. ‘Bing, I feel strange,’ she said, ‘so strange.’

‘Strange?’

‘Yes…’ She quivered. ‘Ah, Bing, please, please love me.’

On the sheet there were some streaks of blood, that represented her virginity.

They had lunch at the Red House Western-Style Restaurant. Its exterior was common, not like its gracious interior.

They ordered a lamb, a steak, a fruit salad, a French-snail, and a goose-liver, and a bottle of red wine.

‘Did you say Zhang Ai Ling used to dine here?’ he asked, while pouring two glasses of wine.

‘Yes, her favourite was the steak with mustard sauce.’

‘Hah, is that the reason you ordered the steak?’

‘Well, kind of,’ she began to cut the beef, ‘but I am not a great fan of hers.’

‘I just heard about her.’

‘What? Haven’t you read her books?’

‘No, I know a little about her book Red Rose and White Rose, something about mosquito blood and rice grain that sticks to a man’s clothes.’

‘Haha, is that all?’

‘Yes.’ He lifted the glass for a contact. ‘She must be very famous. She was a Shanghainese, wasn’t she?’

‘Yes,’ she sipped the wine. ‘You don’t read books?’

‘I read some, back in the university.’

‘I began reading her books at my middle school.’

‘Really?’ The lamb was very tender. ‘I reckon her readers are mostly women?’

‘Well, maybe, but anybody can read it.’

‘So how good is it?’

‘Well, how can I say.’ Vivian cut a small piece of goose liver and ate. ‘She was sharp, sensitive, and pessimistic. She told truth, though in a cruel way. Well, you had better read it yourself.’

‘I may.’

The small amount of  meat in the snail was not much to taste. He still preferred the Australian clam with blood and flesh. And the goose liver tasted a bit strange. He couldn’t describe it properly. But the wine and lamb were beautiful.

‘What do you do after work?’ Vivian opened the topic unexpectedly.

‘Me? Some TV, internet forum.’

‘Is that all?’

‘Well, I have just divorced,’ he said, chewing. ‘A new lifestyle is yet to form.’

‘Many people say Australia is like a village.’

‘Well, you have been there twice, you know what it is like,’ he said. ‘It is of course different from China.’

‘I just can’t envision what one is supposed to do after work.’

‘What do you do here after work?’

‘A lot of things.’

‘For example?’

‘Dinner, bar, concert, movie, book reading, travelling, camping, hairdressing, facial masking, feet-washing.’

‘Then you can do those in Australia as well, except feet-washing, I think,’ He said, though conscious of the fact that Qiuyan, and many others he knew, had scarcely done these activities as pastimes. ‘Of course, an average family with children and a mortgage may not be able to afford both time and money to lead such a life.’

‘How about your work?’

‘Just a job.’

‘You don’t like it? Don’t have some kind of ambitions like people here usually have?’

‘You mean, to make more money?’

‘Sort of, but not just money. Success. Achievement.’

‘I know what you mean.’ He chewed, thoughtfully. ‘I don’t feel a passion, a drive for something like that.’

‘For me, I don’t dislike what I am doing. I have many friends, we do many things together.’

‘I know.’

‘Have you considered coming back to China?’

‘Sometimes. If anything, the reason might be more for my mum’s sake.’

‘Is your mum not well?’

‘Yes, she is fine, with my sister.’ He sipped. ‘She is lonely, not as happy as she used to be.’

After lunch, Vivian led him to Colourful Café, the place she said was just under the building where Zhang Ai Ling used to live.

‘Do you often come here?’ he asked.

‘Not now, quite often in my younger years though.’

Bing went to the book display. ‘Maybe I need to buy one or two of her books?’

‘No need, I have plenty at my home.’

Bing was delighted at her mentioning her home. ‘Please lend me your favourite,’ he said, then noticing a photo on the wall, he added, ‘so this is her? Strange, I felt you resemble her not a little.’

‘What? You are kidding.’

‘I don’t mean your face, which is of course more beautiful than hers,’ he said. ‘Deportment? Disposition? Temperament? Or the eyes? Or her dress?’

‘How can you know? From just a photo?’ Vivian chuckled. ‘You need to read her book to understand her.’

Now the music was on, being played by an old-fashioned gramophone. With its enormous flare bell casting upwards, the instrument was the first of its kind Bing had ever seen. ‘What a thing, is that something belonging to old Shanghai.’

‘Interesting, isn’t it?’

They came back to their seats. More customers were around; among them, he noticed two or three western visitors.

‘Why are there foreigners here?’

‘Well, Eileen is not just famous in China.’

‘Eileen?’

‘That is her English name,’ Vivian said, ‘It actually came from the English ‘ailing’, but her original name was not even Ai Ling.’

‘Really? Ailing? As weak as Lin Dai Yu characterised in the book of Dream of Red Chamber?’ Bing threw another glance at the photo, but he didn’t see the sort of weakness like that of the heroine in the famous Chinese classic novel.

The waitress came over, handing over two cups of coffee, and left.

‘The coffee here is not too bad,’ Vivian commented.

Bing sipped the coffee, ‘I can’t tell any difference.’

‘You don’t drink coffee?’

‘Rarely.’

‘Tea?’ she stirred the coffee with the spoon, ‘or just beer?’

‘Just beer,’ he laughed.

‘Then, tonight let’s go to a bar.’

He was glad. ‘Thank you, you are so kind.’

‘Haha, you sound like you’re an alcoholic.’

The music was soft and languid, with an effect of luring one to sleep.

She said, ‘I used to stay here for whole afternoons, reading a book.’

‘Did you? I didn’t realize you could be so sentimental.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean you impressed me more with your vitality and flaming charm, but not so much with your sentimentality.’

‘Well, how much do you know about me?’ she smiled ruefully.

Slightly abashed, he didn’t answer. Yes, indeed, what kind of person is she? He doesn’t even know what books she likes, what things she likes to do, and for what reasons she had married her first husband. And how much in his remembrance of her has been real, how much imaginary? And why every time he was making love with her, he was assured in himself he loved her? Then as soon as he rolled off her body, as soon as she resumed the frame of her personality, she grew distant to him?

Of course, they had not lived together for any meaningful period of time. But if they did, what picture was it going to be? What things and qualities in him really made her admire him? Before it might have been his guitar skills, but today he had nothing, and she was a woman with fastidious tastes and elegance and greed that had been nurtured and stewed for hundreds of years in a kind of cultural container, stuffed with a multitude of sweet and stale substances belonging particularly to this city, massed up by – oh, what a number! – more than twenty million people.   

‘What are you thinking?’ she asked, obviously having detected his silence and the turn of his mood.

He lifted his eyelids, and said calmly, ‘I am thinking of marrying you.’

Under his gaze, her eyes and cheeks went through a palpable wave of joyful surprise. ‘Hehe, are you proposing?’

‘Yes.’

‘If we marry, do you want me to live in Australia? Or you come back to China?’

‘Is that an issue?’ his voice was tinged with an involuntary indignation.  

Apparently she had detected his resentment in his voice. She smiled gently, and with a melting feminine tenderness, she pacified him, ‘Hehe, then you come back to China, will you?’

‘Me?’ he drank the coffer, which was already cold and bitter. ‘What can I do in China?’

‘See, you are not so much an impractical person,’ she said.

‘But why?’ he was not pacified, ‘Why do we make it impossible? It is not that I can’t go back China, I can. If I can’t survive in this city, I can go anywhere to teach English, or to be a farmer, so long as I can live with you. Is there anything in this world that has to screw up an obvious matter like this?’

She didn’t respond.



-- To Next Post --
I
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发表于 2014-12-8 22:06 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 何木 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 何木 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
Chapter 75      2/2





The music was drawling, making his heart weak, and impotent. He threw another look at the Eileen Zhang’s photo on the wall. Then all of the sudden, he seemed enlightened; he thought he had an answer.

‘Yes, I know,’ he said.

‘What?’

‘It is opium.’

‘Opium? What are you talking about?’

‘The people in this city are all addicted to a sort of cultural-opium, rendered languishing, indolent, materialistic, lethargic, indulgent, rotten, bloodless, droning, whining, ailing, trivial, pathetic, spoiled, pampered, soft-boned, self-pitying, with unfounded pride, ridiculous ego, and absurd superiority.’

She broke into laugher, drawing the attention of other people in the room. ‘Are you scolding me, or the world?’

In spite of himself, he chuckled, ‘The world.’

‘Well,’ Vivian wore a teacher’s solemnity, ‘if you think Eileen was a soft-boned, you are wrong. She dared love her love with her whole being, cut her own heart, and watch it bleeding.’

He was stunned. ‘Did she?’ he said, staring at Vivian, then at Aileen.

‘I advise you read her story.’ She concluded with a final note. ‘And read more about Shanghai, and more about China in general.’

He was defeated, and aroused. He caught her hand and with a lust in his eyes, he said, ‘Let’s go.’

She withdrew her hand, but she arose.

Hailing a taxi, they went straight back to his hotel.



He treads further down the beach, close to the waterline, where his shadow merges with the darkness until it is all gone.

The tide is constantly flirting with his feet. It approaches and ebbs away. The sand, retreating from his insteps, feels silky like her breasts.

On the shore, the rows of building blocks shimmered in the moonlight. The beach is his.

But it is not. He sees another human figure in a distance.

It is a man in T-shirt and short pants, who doesn’t seem to notice Bing’s approach. He runs with his head down between two fishing rods planted in the sand, at the foot of one of which is a plastic bucket.

Ah, what an idea! He is fishing in Surfers Paradise.

‘Hi.’  

The man was alerted. ‘Hi, hi,’ he said, straightening up.

‘Have you caught anything?’

‘Not yet.’

‘Why do you fish at night?’

‘It is the best time of the day.’

‘Best of day? Isn’t the dawn?’

‘Well, to me, the night is the best.’

‘Interesting.’

‘Every one has his own best time of day.’

‘Oh…’ still confused, Bing is thinking of a proverb – every dog has its day. ‘Enjoy your fishing and good luck.’

‘Thank you, bye, bye.’

Lapsing into his solitude, Bing wonders if the man has a wife who may complain about his hobby? Or is he single like him? Now the solitary figure of the American lady dancing in Shanghai also comes to his mind. They both seemed to be happy enough. But how about the 84-year-old cleaner in Chengdu? Isn’t she even happier? Smoking and drinking among the rubbish every day?

If there is anything in common among the three, that is the fact that they are all in their late years. They have something they enjoy doing. They don’t have an apparent intent to earn much, to own things for future. But wait a minute, do they have a future?

Or just because they don’t have a future, they are happy?

But without love, the one bleeding from her, and from him, what is the point of being happy at all.   




-- the End --
I

发表于 2014-12-9 01:30 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 尘凡无忧 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 尘凡无忧 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:02 编辑

。。

发表于 2014-12-9 07:49 |显示全部楼层
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尘凡无忧 发表于 2014-12-9 00:30
恭喜。终于坚持看到完篇了。佩服一下我的毅力。。。
结局在意料之中。如果没有记错,斌的回忆开始于在海 ...

谢谢评论谢谢阅读,最新版本第一章提到秋燕那段已经去掉了..不是为了结尾如何,而是为了更紧凑.

或许爱性这些都不是主题,道德更不是..

最后书的版本如何现在我也不知道...
I

发表于 2014-12-9 14:21 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 尘凡无忧 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 尘凡无忧 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:07 编辑

。。

发表于 2014-12-9 17:12 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 何木 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 何木 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
尘凡无忧 发表于 2014-12-9 13:21
呵呵,变化太快了啊。。那就收回我的那些胡言乱语。。

你谦虚了。。每个读者都会有自己的理解,不是胡言。。我才是经常胡言乱语。

无论社会和道德对人性如何包装,所处的环境如何,人的本质冲动并没有变化。我希望用文字描述一个没有‘穿衣服’的人,展示一下,并不说白这个人的美丑。其实老外看小说的思维可能不一样,我觉得他们没有通过一个人就要去反映什么中国人这个概念。因为地球上一个小角落的人都会形形色色,何况这个大国家。如果要说‘好人’,或许彬的朋友们大都还是不错,真实的。。

关键是临摹一下时代和地域背景,通过一个移民故事。。还有,斌,和我都不信教,天堂地狱是一样的,虚构的东西。。小说总体上倾向于悲观虚无的生命。。有没有灵魂呢?人类自己说有,那就有,反正没有其他的物种反驳你。 不过大脑稍微受点伤,就会痴呆,所以还是倾向于没有什么灵魂的好。。死了有没有呢?如果有的话,这个世界到处都是鬼魂了,都呼吸到肺了。。
I
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发表于 2014-12-10 01:18 |显示全部楼层
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本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:04 编辑

。。

发表于 2014-12-10 11:06 |显示全部楼层
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尘凡无忧 发表于 2014-12-10 00:18
嗯,我比较传统正规,俗话说的假正经。。所以我很看不惯这个斌,不过我不否认有这样的人的存在,也乐于理 ...

你的总结不错:斌不单是一个没有穿衣服的人,也是一个松散的,空洞的,没有边框的人,随心所欲,无矩可逾。。。

每个人都有上升的力量,也有下降的力量,斌就是那种游离在上下之间的那种人。这种状态每个人都会有,而且在‘吃饱了饭’之后‘更经常的有’。

前面诱惑的光,激发我们去上升,去争取,可是等你见到了这个光呢?。。那么为什么要去上升?停留不好么?一直远距离的看会比到达那里更差么?或者倒退几步,光更加吸引人?

灵性和激情不过是短暂的疯狂状态 -disorder,坚持和努力是无聊的代名词。。那个飘的主人公只是有一种对土地的癖好,她有爱么?不也不得其门而入。。。

有乐观就有悲观,它们同为一体。描写乐观让你有短暂的激情,象听了一个励志讲座 (听完??。。),描写悲观才反映实在的生存状态,才会让人不那么‘狂躁’,影子让你冷静,阳光灼伤你的眼睛。





I

发表于 2014-12-10 13:21 来自手机 |显示全部楼层
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本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:06 编辑

。。

发表于 2014-12-10 18:37 |显示全部楼层
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尘凡无忧 发表于 2014-12-10 12:21
哈哈。太哲了。。
我以为的力量是专指上升的力量。。
如果光芒带有诱惑,它必定是虚设的,终会幻灭。。

我觉得空气比土地重要
太阳也不错,要好好拥抱下
万物里有蟑螂和蚂蚁
蛇在吞吃鳄鱼
恐怖份子高举‘不幻灭的光芒’
热爱生命
所以造人折磨地球
升吧升吧
毛主席在招手
。。。

我这胡言乱语下。。




I

发表于 2014-12-10 23:20 来自手机 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 尘凡无忧 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 尘凡无忧 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:08 编辑

。。
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发表于 2014-12-11 08:00 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 何木 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 何木 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
尘凡无忧 发表于 2014-12-10 22:20
呵呵。太开阔我的思路了。。
看到造人折磨地球,被击中了。我有三个小孩。。忏悔去了。。。 ...

我也有三个,要让他们箍牙,上大学买房子娶媳妇...

完了,如果有其他人看这个帖子会不会认为我们是一对夫妻?小孩一样多?一个要上升一个要下降?
I

发表于 2014-12-11 10:44 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 尘凡无忧 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 尘凡无忧 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
本帖最后由 尘凡无忧 于 2014-12-13 09:09 编辑

。。

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