中国人在美国说笑话 － Ｊｏｅ Ｗｏｎｇ

rdcwayx

更新： 12楼有台词。

不知道这个有没有贴过：


其中的几个搞笑段子：

段子之一：「我是新移民，当年来美国后，我开着一辆旧车，车后保险杆上贴了不少标语贴纸，我都不懂，撕也撕不下来，我开了两年之后，才知道其中一张是『如果你不懂英语，滚回去』。」

段子之二：「我好不容易才获取公民资格，我得去上美国历史课，去回答 谁是班杰明．富兰克林？我都只有啊…的份。去年，我儿子在美国出生，我抱着他，『哇，你这小子一出生就已经是美国人了，我问你，你知道谁是富兰克林吗？』」

段子之三：「现在我车上贴了『车内有婴儿』的标语，这可算是一种恐吓，因为有一个大哭的婴儿和唠叨的老婆，我再也不怕死了。」

[ 本帖最后由 rdcwayx 于 2009-5-6 21:23 编辑 ]

魔头

贴过， 还有视频的

小豹子

唉,我英语太差了,听不懂....

rdcwayx

他本身就是以中式英文搞笑的。有很重的口音。

我也是看了两遍才知道个大概，上面贴的中文解释或许可以帮助你理解。

小豹子

富兰克林那一段说的什么，没听懂。。。什么 convenience store...

rdcwayx

富兰克林头像在100刀美元上。

edith921

我举手，我大概听懂这段了

意思是，公民考试，问本杰明·富兰克林是谁

他想想，哇，the reason a conveniece store gets robbed（百元大钞上是他的头像）

第二次，怎么的了，好像是又考，又问

他又这么答的。

他后来有儿子了，抱着他儿子，心想，哇，他才刚出生，就已经是us citizen啦！

然后他问他儿子：do u even know who is 本杰明·富兰克林?!

＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝分割线＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
看上面解释好像不是公民考试，是上课。不过问题都是那一个，回答也是那一个。

[ 本帖最后由 edith921 于 2009-5-6 11:26 编辑 ]

bulaohu

不是第二次，而是宪法第二修正案，是美国公民可以持枪的法律根源

小豹子

原帖由 bulaohu 于 2009-5-6 11:28 发表
不是第二次，而是宪法第二修正案，是美国公民可以持枪的法律根源

谢谢，明白了。

一开始他是不是说，男人在18岁时达到 sexual peak， 他直到 25 岁才有？后面又说了什么？

糊里糊涂

谁来说说 peach和运动那两段.

cisco

原帖由 bulaohu 于 2009-5-6 11:28 发表
不是第二次，而是宪法第二修正案，是美国公民可以持枪的法律根源

这都知道,服了.

rdcwayx

Joe Wong's Letterman Show script

Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.

I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.

I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.

I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:

"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"

I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?

And the second one was:

"What's the 2nd Amendment?"

I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?

"What is Roe vs. Wade?"

I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?

I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!

I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."

So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"

Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”

This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.

Thank you very much!

Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:

1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.

2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.

"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.

Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".

Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.

The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".

北京洋娃娃

感觉很赞。。。(paopaobing(56))

LONELYMELBOURNE

关于2dn amendment and Roe vs. Wade确实需要一些背景知识，其他的还不是太难听懂，虽然这哥们的口音确实挺重。虽然英语不好，但是勇气可嘉。