一起上课，提高工作场合EQ

Ritacow

这两天看到一些讨论工作上遇到的事件，有所感想。觉得为什么大家不把自己的体验拿出来分享，并且分析分析如果遇上XXXX的事件，怎么面对和resolve. 在这里上堂课，提高自己每一天在公司的EQ.
I will start first a work scenario with potential solutions. 你们可以看看同不同意and + 你们自己的见解 。你们也可以写一些让你们困惑的issues,大家来解答。

Scenario 1: The 讨厌的同事
近几年来我一直必须得和一位很烦的同事合作。He is just impossible!他自大，固执还有时候很粗鲁。总是觉得他自己是正确的。一直以来，我总是忍受，不知会，但是，the situation is getting worse. 工作环境已经坏到，连当我回到家里后，我还耿耿于怀这个人是多么的讨厌。同时，因为这个同事的影响，让我身边的其他同事也很miserable, because we all spend so much精力议论这个人的举止。

How do I deal with this situation?
一般来说，很多人会把之上讲道的冲突归类在Personality不合。Personality的问题呢，在一定程度上是imply改变不了的。所以我们来抛弃personality clash的讲法。来分析一下怎么应用behavioural change来改善情况.

必须的承认，一个巴掌拍不响。如果主人翁一开始总是忍受，这也有一定的contributed to the problem。
批判谁对谁错只会让你更头痛。The key is to focus on what YOU can do to make things better.那你最好是focus on你自己的behavioural change。Taken from http://www.work911.com/articles/difcol.htm

Your responsibilities include:
•        approaching the other person in a polite, problem-solving way to work things out. (1)
•        avoiding actions (like gossip) that make the situation worse.
•        a willingness to recognize that you have probably contributed to the problem.
•        listening to the other person rather than trying to convince or bully them.
•        seeking help from others in a dignified, open and constructive way.

Your rights include:
•        setting behavioral limits and consequences when nasty, abusive behaviour is directed at you. (2)
•        the expectation that the other person will work in an open problem solving and courteous way.
•        an expectation that management will help, but may not be able to solve the problem without your cooperation and that of the other person.

解：(1) & (2)
(1) – Be upfront and genuine in your approach & open discussion by not bring accusational. Use more of “I feel, I…”
XXX, I've noticed that you and I seem to have our differences. I have some ideas about how we might be able to work more effectively together, but I would like to know from you what I can do to help. Can you think of anything I could be doing so we could get along better?
(2) – Set boundaries that you are comfortable with and indicate this as a two way proposition.
John, what would help me is that when we are at meetings and I am talking, that you wait until I am finished to make your comments, since it really distracts me if you talk before I am finished, and I can't listen properly to you when I am distracted.

zhengtao

找出去喝几次酒，然后什么都解决了。屡试不爽。

Ritacow

原帖由 zhengtao 于 2008-12-18 23:21 发表
找出去喝几次酒，然后什么都解决了。屡试不爽。

HA! good point, i hope that works for you in all situations :)

sujiea

学习，谢谢楼主大公司交流处事之道。

happyface

support

zhengtao

原帖由 Ritacow 于 2008-12-19 00:01 发表


HA! good point, i hope that works for you in all situations :)

so far so good