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[原创作品] 英文小说: A Shadow in Surfers Paradise(43) 天堂之影 [复制链接]

发表于 2014-6-8 15:40 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 洋八路 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 洋八路 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
Chapter 43     1/2





Their courtship thus resumed, Bing called her every other day, an interval deemed appropriate by his accomplice sister for the initial courting stage. On each weekend he would ask for a date, and although she was always reluctant, giving certain excuses to make things a little more difficult, he was able to win half of his requests and go to Happy Mountain to see her and dine with her.

He had not yet kissed her. He had been waiting for the chance, but she was rather conservative in that direction. Nevertheless, while walking together in the street she would allow him to clasp her hand, and when sitting closely to each other in a park, she would let him study her fingers. As time went merrily on, his desire for her was gaining momentum, but he held his patience and kept on his efforts like the water running unhurriedly in a stream.      

It was indeed a milestone of progress that, after many requests, she had finally agreed to have a weekend meeting in Jiaoda instead of Happy Mountain. At 10am on the Saturday morning he was supposed to meet her at the bus station. He had a Yongjiu (Forever Durable) bicycle, which was the best of its kind in the country. If he remembered right, this was the fifth bicycle he had bought since he could afford to buy one. All of his previous ones had been stolen by someone he would never know. Theft of bicycles was very common in those days and the police, without enough resources, didn’t bother trying to find them. Many losers might just steal another one, or exchange - if the word ‘exchange’ could be morally used for ‘stealing from each other’. Nearly everyone needed a bicycle, for it was the sole means of transportation for the hundreds of millions of Chinese. It was so indispensable to survive in society that the loss of it was surely a great pain. Therefore, the theft was contagious and widespread. You could hardly find a colleague or friend who had not lost one or more bicycles. However, Bing was a teacher, he should be good, so he didn’t steal. He always bought one immediately after the theft, after cursing the sky for one or two days. The current one cost him ninety Yuan, roughly one third of his monthly salary.

So at 9:30, he was proudly riding his bicycle, the most precious material he possessed in the world, going to the station to welcome Qiuyan, who had become, as he believed, his ‘formal’ girlfriend. The sun was not seen in the sky, so the day was not bright. But he had joy and desire in his heart that would turn the world from black to white and stir the air from dead to live.

Qiuyan was wearing a white shirt and blue jeans, which made her slim and firm figure more evident and remarkable. Under her pretty surface, her spiritual kernel was like, as Bing began to sum up her character, a little chilli that would fire at you surprisingly if touched improperly or digested hastily. Her quiet and shy appearance could give you a wrong impression, lure you to believe she was an easy and tameable creature, until your fingers were burned, your tongue scorched.

Sitting on the back rack of his Eternal bicycle, she didn’t place her hand around his waist as he had wished. He didn’t often carry others on his bicycle, but when he did, most of the free riders, even sometimes his female colleagues, would not shy away from clutching his waist or at least his clothes in order to steady their journey. This was particularly necessary when the road was rough and bumpy, and the danger of shaking them from the rack was real.

However, for the whole distance they travelled, Qiuyan had not touched him at all, managing her stability extraordinarily well on the small, uncomfortable ‘passenger seat’, even if the road was hardly smooth.  

They didn’t say much; the only talk they had in their fifteen minutes trip was his asking ‘Qiuyan, maybe you have better bicycle skills and could carry me instead?’ and her short reply ‘No.’

He led her into his room, which, through his preparatory work, was one hundred times tidier and cleaner than usual. As soon as she was ushered in, she asked, ‘Do you play the guitar?’

‘Yes,’ he answered, noticing her eyes were at the moment on the instrument hung against the wall. ‘Hehe, not very well, but I can play a tune for you if you like.’

Already moving away to browse other things in room, she made no answer to his offer. He was a little disappointed, as if he had lost an opportunity to show off before her the only token for his personal attraction he thought he had.      

As it was nearing lunch time, they discussed where to eat. His plan was go to a restaurant, but she insisted on just eating in the canteen, saying that she had missed the big dining hall that had impressed her during her stay in the university. So, after failing to change her mind, he listened to her grudgingly, and had to miss the desirable drink that would always relax him and make him more himself, or less himself but definitely more comfortable. And for a moment he wondered where her tenderness and lamb-like submission had gone. Why did she have to be so obstinate in deciding on place to eat? It was indeed quite a deviation of her temperament from that of the first impression she had made on him when she was quietly looking at those bamboos.

They went to the dining hall, at the back of No. 2 students dormitory building. They could also have gone to the teacher’s canteen, farther down in the direction of the library, but the food was much the same. So for his meals he would usually go the short way to the student’s canteen. And as a bachelor, he always felt better among the young students, in a hall at least four times bigger and ten times noisier than the one in Shangwai. Besides, there from his students he could receive a lot of respectful greetings, enjoy the large amount of satisfaction which befitted the glorious teaching profession.

But today, he was with a girl, his girl friend. So as soon as he stepped into the room, he felt, real or imaginary, a wave of curious looks upon him and her. Yet looking at her, he didn’t find her to be as shy at all as he could have expected on such an occasion. Then, a quick idea came to him - was it possible she just wanted to show in public that he was with her, that he had a girl friend, so as to drive away other girls who might have an interest in him? Naïve and also conceited it seemed to be, it was not entirely impossible. After all, she was a little spicy, which could be very active in both her temper and her mind.
Well, it didn’t matter; it was not as if he had many girls after him.

During the course, one or two students said hello to him. But no doubt their interest was keener in her than himself. It was a sure thing that in a few days the students in his class, including the one who had written him a love letter, would know he had a girl friend, and announce the news to the world. It was such a signal of ending his lonely and sneaky living for the last five years! Why hadn’t he considered this impact when he invited her over to the campus?

His feelings were rankly mixed. First, he had not specifically speculated upon the consequences it would have after eating or walking together with her on the campus. For him, the matter was entirely between the two of them; the social aspect of the relationship had not yet affected the metrics of his concern. Therefore, the current publicity was more an unwanted surprise to him than a desired result. Second, the girl beside him was pretty, vivaciously attractive; the pride of a man dating such a girl was undeniably feeding his egoism well. Then, as his jaw chewed a piece of soft pig bone, a terrible thought crossed him - what if Vivian, yes Vivian was taking the very place of Qiuyan, to sit beside him at this moment?!

Ah, my heavens! What would I have felt if Vivian were eating right here with me? At the foot of lonely Emei Mountain? What if that flashy face, huge speaking eyes were here being beheld and admired by my students? Was this scene still much uninspiring, or unanticipated like this?

A twinge of guilt in his stomach drove his eyes to Qiuyan, who with her small mouth was presently eating carefully and almost fastidiously the vegetables. To his mind, she seemed suddenly so weak, so vulnerable and fragile. A surge of compassion, as strong as his guilty feeling, took control of him, commanding a necessity to protect her, to shield her from what specific threat he couldn’t define. Maybe it was Vivian; maybe it was his buried, bewitched and pathetic love for her that, like a brute, like a dead yet undead demon, would attack him as well as the girl beside him, the very person who had remarkably blown into him a feeling of life during the last couple of months.

After lunch, they went out of the dining room, without holding hands. But as they climbed the steep stone steps that led to his dormitory, he paused to hold her waist and surprise her by landing a quick but soft kiss on her forehead. In that instant, he felt a love for her, and a pity for himself, equally ardent.

Back in his room, no sooner had Qiuyan sat down in the chair than she said, smiling, ‘So now, what do we do this afternoon? Are you taking me somewhere?’

Bing, preparing tea, was a little surprised by her quick and direct question. He turned and answered archly, with an undertone that could hint at something else, ‘No, why, we’ll just stay here, this is the best place I want to take you.’

He brought her tea to the table, pulled over a chair closer to her and sat down. She appeared calm, reserving her right to launch a response. But before she did, he added lightly, ‘and there is a bed if you, and… I, feel tired.’

Her face was suddenly serious, scowling at him long enough to make him regret his flippancy. Then, as if convinced he was enough intimidated, she said sternly: ‘Mr. Wang, what are you thinking of in your little brain?’

Embarrassed, and exceedingly uneasy, he was thinking hard for a reply to soothe her ruffled dignity, and also relieve his own shame for the insinuation. But before he did, she burst into laughter.

‘Oh, my…’ he exclaimed, now realizing she had been feigning her wrath, ‘you scared me!’ then, chuckling, ‘and no, Lin Qiuyan, I swear I didn’t think of anything like what you are thinking in your little brain.’

She laughed, her hands at her lips, ‘Well, well, seriously, where will we go? We can’t just sit here all afternoon.’

‘Fine, fine, seriously, where do you want to go?’ he agreed, cheering up, ‘maybe go to Baoguo Temple again, to burn more incense?’

‘Not a bad idea, better than sitting here doing nothing.’

Then a thread of his romanticism knocked his mind, ‘How about I take you to the place I often go to play my guitar?’

‘Where? Is it far from here?’

‘No, about a twenty minute walk.’

‘All right then.’ She got up at once and walked to the door, as if the chair was on fire and she had to flee.

Also rising, he followed her, opening the door for her. In another minute, they were on the stairs, when Qiuyan reminded him, ‘Wait, you forget your guitar.’

‘You want me to bring my guitar?’ he asked, ‘I thought you are not interested.’

‘Well, but aren’t we going to the place you play guitar?’

He detected in her answer a loose logic, but he said just the same, ‘Okay, let me go get it.’  


--to next post--

英文写作老师
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发表于 2014-6-8 15:43 |显示全部楼层
此文章由 洋八路 原创或转贴,不代表本站立场和观点,版权归 oursteps.com.au 和作者 洋八路 所有!转贴必须注明作者、出处和本声明,并保持内容完整
Chapter 43     2/2



Some time later, he walked with her side by side, the guitar strapped to his back, and his hand holding her slim shoulder. The intimacy they were exhibiting was indeed a bit ostentatious. But since the path they took was a short cut to the outskirts of the campus, they wouldn’t likely run into any students or teachers. Following the narrow, sinuous track down a hill, they came to a ridge between rice fields. In June, the rice crops were either ‘pregnant’ or still flowering. They saw a number of white ducks; some of them, with their brown beaks, were busily ploughing the water field, while others unperturbedly took their rest on the ridge. Now and then, one of them might suddenly jerk its neck up to the air, flap its fan-like wings and utter a series of quacks that sounded so happy and hilarious.        

For a moment, he felt as if he was treading the fields in his home village. To imagine that just minutes away from the university, where the students and the highbrowed professors had their unsoiled habitation, lay such a village, and to imagine the village’s composition was manure, chickens, ducks, cows, sweating peasants, and mud-houses, and the drop-toilets…  

‘Where is it?’ Qiuyan snapped his moment of meditation, ‘this is just a rice field.’

Bing pointed, ‘Over there, a river, another ten minutes.’

‘River? Are you kidding? There is no river here to my knowledge.’

‘No, there is a big, wide and deep river, I go swimming over there every week in summer,’ he looked at her, ‘naked.’

At his joke she giggled like a little woman, her small breasts teetering within her shirt. ‘Haha, you are very yellow - pornographic, don’t you fear your female students may catch sight of you?’

‘Yellow? Not yellow, I am just sexy,’ he teased, ‘if you like, I can swim in front of you, after all, you are one of my female students.’

She removed his hand from her shoulder, ‘You, yellow man, yellow teacher, I wonder how many female students you have ever attempted to woo over.’

‘You want to know the number?’

She turned to him, as serious as a green but hot chilli, ‘Yes, how many?’

‘Many a one.’

‘Many a one?’ She halted her steps, sharp eyes staring at him.

‘Yes, many, many, many, and then one.’

Her spicy eyes glared, ‘If you dare tease me again ….’

‘Okay, the real answer is nobody but you,’ he admitted.

She moved on, giving her words emphasis, ‘But me, you must stick to it.’

At this time, the river was in their sight.

‘What,’ Qiuyan said aloud, ‘you say this is a river? Just a stream!’

‘Well, in spring, when the water is plenty and rushing, it is a river,’ he then pointed at the bridge, ‘look at the bridge, isn’t it nice?’

Seeing that, Qiuyan was trotting towards to it. ‘Oh, this is an Iron Cable Bridge. So beautiful, I didn’t know there was such a bridge in this place.’

She stepped on it, the bridge was immediately bouncing; she deliberately stamped her feet, the bridge was briskly animated and creaking. Until she reached its middle, she bent over the rail, looking at the water underneath.

He went over to join her, stamping with a force enough to cause a spring. But she wasn’t scared as he had expected, keeping her water-contemplating stance unchanged.

The water was very clear, the plants on its fringes were flourishing, the grasses submerged in the water were wavering graciously with the flow. For a long minute, side by side, they were both enraptured in the tranquil scenery. Then she straightened her back, her eyes travelling along the length of bridge. ‘How long is it?’

‘About twenty five meters,’ he gave a number he had estimated with his feet before, ‘about one quarter of the famous Luding Iron Cable Bridge, for which the Red Army fiercely fought during the Long March (of Chairman Mao).’

The rail fence was rusty, but the whole structure remained lean and strong with a tenacity suggestive of a formidable history. How many years had it survived the weather and weight of people crossing? Twenty? Or more than his own years? Then he noticed, on the surface of the water, lay the shadow of the bridge and the shadows of them. He turned his head and found the sun, half shaded by the cloud, was there smiling.

A happy feeling, romantic and poetic, suddenly stirred in his heart. The body of Qiuyan, slim yet inwardly strong, now in his eyes, seemed to bear the tantalising aspects of the bridge. A passion awoke; a flow of warmth began to course through his frame. He stepped over, reached her back, shoved away the guitar, and with two hands crossing over her front, he embraced her.

She was quiet. The moment was a paradise. She was small, felt easier in his arms than his remembered experience of women. He knew she had a fire that would ignite any second, but when she was gentle and placid like this, she had all the tenderness and softness he willed to desire and imagine.

He felt himself growing, slowly and steadily, with a life so acutely awakening. If only he could make love now with her on the bridge!

In no time his hands were daring to close at her breasts. And the guitar, now such a nuisance, slipped over to his side, and he had to shove it away to his back. At this moment, she reacted and raised her body. Quietly removing his hands, she turned away from him. His excited device was now alone, losing the kind of anchorage without which a man can no longer thrive.

Without a word, she moved on, and he followed.

Then she said plainly, ‘Where do we go?’

‘There, on the side of the river,’ he replied, walking faster to precede her.

At the other end of the bridge, there was a small path leading down to the stream. Both sides of it were thick with grasses and some small plants with tiny flowers. A lot of butterflies, coloured marvellously, disturbed by their adventure, skipped between the leaves, jumping, whirling, perching over flower tips.

Turning over, he smiled to her, whose face, at the moment, was displaying an expression of his first impression of her. She smiled demurely, with a beautiful sadness, but not so much as she might have wished to assume, for, in her eyes, he could see the flutter of her heart. She had a beauty, like the little rice flowers, opening at particular hours to special sunrays, blossoming at particular days to special breeze.

Walking further, he arrived at his place, where a large boulder raised up from the shore. He turned and said to her, ‘Here it is.’

He sat onto the surface and freed the guitar. Then he patted on the clean stone to his left, giving her a signal to sit beside him. She sat down, leaving a little gap between them.

The stream was shallow because he could make out the stone tips even in its middle. There was a bird, slightly bigger than a sparrow, flying very low over the water surface. He sincerely hoped the bird would stay on one of the stone tips, but it didn’t, merely keeping its low flying, back and forth above the water. Small as it was, it couldn’t possibly catch any fish from the stream.

Then what was its purpose of flying like that?

On the water’s edge, there were clutches of shrubs blossoming with yellow flowers, their petals like the wings of a butterfly. He rose and walked to the shore, wishing to see in the water the fish he used to see. The fishes were very small, dashing away as soon as his shadow touched the skin of the water. He called her, ‘Qiuyan, come over.’

Before she came to him, the shoal began to swim back towards the bank, and shot away again the moment Qiuyan stood over them. But soon they swam back as if to entertain the human couple, who would either keep quiet and motionless, or frighten them by suddenly lifting their hands or dabbling the water to wrinkle its surface. And, the fishes, after only a short moment of no-alarm, would always come back to them, as if they need a companion from the land, longing for the excitement and amusement the couple had been enjoying.

A little bee was landing on a yellow flower, he said, ‘Look, a bee.’

Alarmed evidently, she suddenly held his arm, raising her eyes and searching about, ‘where?”

‘Over there, are you so afraid of bees?’

‘Yes, they always scare me,’ her grasp was tightening, ‘when I was little, I was bitten by one, I still remember how swollen my finger were.’

‘Really? Then we must be very careful,’ he said, ‘the bee over there, I know, is the deadliest.’

She gripped him so hard that he could feel a little pain, though it couldn’t be more sweet of that. He went on, ‘Now, move up very, very slowly…’

She moved up very, very slowly. In the meantime, he continued to stifle his laughter. And when he did at last, laugh, his cackling was as if burst from his stomach, breaking the serenity of the stream. As she came to realize his trick, she pulled back swiftly from him. ‘You dare…’ But he used a bit of man power to hold her back, and led her back to their seats. Sitting down, now with the side of her body seamlessly with him, he said to her, ‘Let me play a song to you.’

A lot of songs he could play, but he thought he should play something simple, one she might know. He thought of the ‘Romance’, but banished it immediately as Vivian’s image sneaked into his mind, and decided for the Chinese version of Romeo and Juliet: ‘Liang Shan Bo and Zhu Ying Tai’. He didn’t tell her the title of the music. He picked up the guitar, and asked her to sit on his right so that the back of the guitar would not point at her.

The music was like the running water, like a couple of butterflies, like flying birds, like swimming fishes; the melody was like an iron cable bridge, like the Emei Mountain, like the Happy Mountain, like the 157 steps, like the bamboos and her sad eyes, like her small breasts, like her blushing face…

He felt her hands wrapping around his waist, holding him, leaning into his shoulder; he adjusted the position of the guitar, without discounting the least of his buoyant expression.

When the music faded into the pure chuckle of the stream, he found her asleep. He wanted to kiss her, but hesitated lest he disturb the moment of tranquillity. Leaving her as she was, for the next several minutes, he studied her features. An eyelash was the tiniest brush, a screen of delicacy; her nose was a miniature bridge, thin, with a bony character; her mouth, dewy, had the shape of a half-folded bamboo leaf; her cheeks, tinted with light of the sun, were like…All of sudden, she opened her eyes, and pursing her lips, she chided, ‘What are you looking at?’

‘Hehe, I am not looking, I am thinking…’

‘Oh, you, a Yellow teacher.’

‘Hehe… then you are a Yellow student.’

She separated from him, yawning, ‘I am sleepy.’              

He took the chance, lay aside his guitar, and stood up, swapping the seats with her, for he felt more comfortable with her on his left.

Then, holding her tightly, in a little of her struggle, he kissed her, for the first time, on her lips.
…..

A couple of months later, he married her. His parents were happily surprised, unable to remove their eyes from her when he brought her home. Nobody ever imagined he could have just married unannounced in his university, even some months before his sister’s scheduled marriage.

On the night after the wedding banquet in his village, he was drunk. In the bed full of colour, prepared scrupulously by his parents, he worked for a long time on and inside her body, for more than two hours if he had the sense to remember. It was strange he couldn’t feel the coming, until she clawed deep into his back, whispering in his ears, ‘pain’, before he persuaded and forced himself to shower his love, naked and swelling, into her small container.

After a year of their marriage, she agreed to quit her job to live with him in the university.

In another year, inspired by one of his colleagues going to Canada, he began to speculate on a chance of going abroad. He asked his acquaintances, doing some slow research over the dial-up internet, working out the best way for his overseas adventure.

At last, after comparing the three then most popular target countries, Canada, New Zealand, and Australia, he decided on Australia. Canada, too cold; New Zealand, too small; Australia, sunshine, and with kangaroos, seemed best fit to a purpose. And because his major study of English was not eligible as a skill category for immigration, he would have to do IT study first if he hoped to get permanent residency later on. The choice of university was the least of his worries; he simply picked Deakin University when it was once referred in an internet forum.  

He did English IELTS (International English Language Test System), and obtained high marks on his first try, listening (7), reading (8), writing (9), speaking (8).





--End of Chapter 43--
英文写作老师

发表于 2014-6-9 13:28 |显示全部楼层
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最关键的部分skip了。。就这样结婚了?没有水到渠成的感觉。。
怎么一下子滑得这么快,跟前面极其细腻的写法不一致了,好像失去了耐心。。或者预示着这段婚姻的不谨慎?

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发表于 2014-6-9 15:06 |显示全部楼层
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Gone 发表于 2014-6-9 12:28
最关键的部分skip了。。就这样结婚了?没有水到渠成的感觉。。
怎么一下子滑得这么快,跟前面极其细腻的写 ...

呵呵,说说看少了些什么?--现在你是作者...

觉得中国写的够多了,要写澳洲了

英文写作老师

发表于 2014-6-9 15:23 |显示全部楼层
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很难看懂!

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洋八路 + 5 多看几遍就看懂了

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发表于 2014-6-9 15:38 |显示全部楼层
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stmimi 发表于 2014-6-9 14:23
很难看懂!

谢谢鼓励.我收藏了.
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发表于 2014-6-10 00:18 |显示全部楼层
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洋八路 发表于 2014-6-9 14:06
呵呵,说说看少了些什么?--现在你是作者...

觉得中国写的够多了,要写澳洲了

说少只是相对于之前巨细靡遗的写法。。
婚姻是一个人一生的大事,秋雁的出现占据的比重很低。。直升飞机进入婚姻,没有什么心理的过度,斌是如何下定决心要跟她共度一生的没有提及,感觉草率。。
作者留下巨大的空隙让读者自己填写。。但是作者的铺垫里面看不到多少情感的因素,更不要提如何因爱而想结婚。。
把秋雁的初次留在结婚当夜,对斌来说是个性上的意外之举,感觉按照他之前的情感发展模式,不会hold住。。这种意外的出现作者应当给予适当暗示。。因为在斌的宿舍里时,斌的想法已经那么不规矩了。。
要是我是作者的话。。就这么天马行空想了一下。。哈哈,这种感觉真好。。可惜我不会写,依照你的思路加油写吧。。

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发表于 2014-6-10 00:49 |显示全部楼层
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Gone 发表于 2014-6-9 23:18
说少只是相对于之前巨细靡遗的写法。。
婚姻是一个人一生的大事,秋雁的出现占据的比重很低。。直升飞机 ...

谢谢你的回复.

我目前的思路:

- 斌的“爱”,其实还是vivian...
- 秋燕的出现,填补他的寂寞...感觉不错,到了年龄结婚,其实也是自然.....他们都是四川人,谈得来...是他可以找到的最佳结婚对象,而且她也是失恋后碰到斌的,有那种同病相怜...从上下文,我估计读者可以得出这样的看法...
- 他们婚姻生活后面还有很多写的
- 这里也暗示他们可能的问题,为离婚作准备...

他们结婚那晚是初次,不是初夜....不过没有特别提这个...她pain不是因为....

英文写作老师

发表于 2014-6-10 01:01 |显示全部楼层
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洋八路 发表于 2014-6-9 23:49
谢谢你的回复.

我目前的思路:

原来如此。。爱情啊。。婚姻啊。。大家都是糊涂虫啊。。。。
大概明白你的思路了。。是我没有读明白你的用意。。谢谢你的小说。。晚安。。

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