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Good points in Part 2 for Life at 3:
•Excercising self-control is something most of us battle with in our entire life.The kids play noises in the class, the whingey kids who can't make friends, and the ones bully in the playground are good examples of kids who are not good at self-control.
•The critical time to learn self-control is before kids start school.
•Around the time the child turns 2, the front lobe of the brain starts to mature. The toddler's capacity to record experiences in their long-term memory kicks in. This is when the child starts to remember a sense of self. It's like writing a biography is their heads. One of the things they record is how they feel. Was I sad yesterday? What cheered me up? What happened last week if I was naughty? It's critical to teach a child how to behave.
•Mastering one's own behaviours is called self-regulation.
•Tantrum is a way of toddler to assert independence, telling us they are no longer helpless individual.
•The very first step for a child takes in regulating his behaviours is to become aware of the behaviour itself. Am I still crying, mummy?
•A big task for the toddler to learn self-regulaiton is to manage intensive reactions, like I want it now, I don't want to do this. Learning appropraite behaviours is not about just suppressing your disappointment when you have to comform to the rules. It is also about mastering more positive emotions like the enthusiasm for the task at hand.
•For children how to fit in school, in work and in life, they must pay attention to not just the tasks they love but also to the tasks they find tedious.
•The ability to focus attention both on boring and on fun stuffs maybe is more important than intelligence for the kid to do well.
•Small changes in parenting style, like a little more warm, engaged, consistent with the kid, translate into significantly better outcome. We don't need to be super parents. We only need to make small changes and be more flexible. |
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