请教关于论文摘要的翻译

kreuz777

公司某个领导把自己的论文摘要丢给我翻译，因为我是海归，不过实在没有正统学习过翻译，又把得罪领导。所以特地过路请教大家了。


摘 要

操作风险正成为我国金融机构面临的主要风险之一，我国近几年银行业大案、要案频发令社会震怒，涉案人员数量及金额让人触目惊心。惨痛的教训之后是操作风险越来越被正视，防范和化解操作风险逐渐成为我国银行业的重点，同时其也成为监管部门日益加强关注的监管重点。
然而相对于信用风险、市场风险而言，目前国内对操作风险的研究仍处于发展起步阶段。随着中国银行业的蓬勃发展及与国际银行业的接轨，有必要加强我国商业银行操作风险的管控。
从我国近几年银行业大、要案形成的机构分析，基层机构成为操作风险事件的高发部门，笔者所在的中国银行亦然。“基层机构”由于其承办的业务呈现点多、面广的特点，成为各家商业银行操作风险防控的重中之重。在对基层机构的操作风险管理中，如何借鉴国际先进银行操作风险管理的理念，进一步结合本国或本行实际，进行管理创新尤为重要。
本文以操作风险管理为核心，在结构安排上共分四章：
第一章，引言。主要阐述了本文的选题依据，并表明了写作本文的目的和意义。
第二章，操作风险相关概念和理论。本章主要阐述了操作风险的特点、分类，国际先进银行操作风险管理的经验。
第三、四章是本文的重心所在。
第三章，中行基层机构操作风险现状分析。本章先从目前中行操作风险管理的实践做法入手，采取案例分析法，对所收集到的中国银行基层机构操作风险数据进行分类、统计，并结合操作风险产生的原因，评析目前中行基层机构操作风险管理中存在的不足。
第四章，完善中行基层机构操作风险管理的建议。本章针对目前中行基层机构操作风险管理中存在的不足，借鉴国际先进银行操作风险管理的经验，设计相关的基层机构操作风险管理方案，对如何加大中行基层机构的管控提出了自己的一些改进建议。


关键词： 中国银行，基层机构，操作风险，研究
Abstract  

Operational risk financial institutions in our country is becoming one of the main risks facing China's banking sector in recent years, major, important and frequent social anger, the number of people involved and the amount of shocking people. After a painful lesson to be more and more operational risk are to face up to prevent and reduce operational risk has gradually become the focus of China's banking industry, while regulatory authorities have become increasingly concerned about the focus of supervision.  
However, in relation to credit risk, market risk, operational risk of the current research is still at the initial stage of development. With the vigorous development of China's banking sector and with the international banking world, there is a need to strengthen our country's commercial bank operational risk management and control.  
From our country in recent years the banking industry, and important analysis of the formation of institutions, grass-roots organizations to become operational risk department of the high case, the author's Bank of China as well. "Grass-roots institutions" because of its contractors to a point many of the business, a wide range of features, to become commercial banks the top priority of the prevention and control of operational risk. At the grass-roots organizations in the operation of risk management, how to learn from advanced international banks operating in the concept of risk management, further integration of the country or the Bank, carry out the management of innovation is particularly important.  
In this paper, operational risk management as the core, on the structure is divided into four chapters:  
Chapter I, Introduction. The main topics on the basis of this article, and demonstrates the writing of the purpose and significance of this article.  
Chapter II, operational risk-related concepts and theories. This chapter focused on the characteristics of operational risk, classification, advanced operational risk management of banking experience.  
Third, the four chapters are the focal point of this article.  
Chapter III, Bank of China grass-roots institutions operational risk analysis. Bank of China to operate in this chapter from the current practice of risk management practices to start, take the case analysis, collected on the grass-roots institutions, Bank of China to classify operational risk data, statistics, combined with the causes of operational risk, assessment of the current grass-roots institutions Bank of China operational risk management shortcomings.  
Chapter IV, Bank of China to improve grass-roots institutions operational risk management. Bank of China in this chapter for the current operation of the grass-roots organizations in risk management weaknesses, learn from advanced international banking experience in operational risk management, design-related operational risk management of grass-roots institutions program, Bank of China on how to increase grass-roots organizations control some of his own suggestions for improvement.  


Keywords: Bank of China, the grass-roots institutions, operational risk, research

以上是翻译器翻译的，本身想在这上面做下修改，不过先拿来问问有什么很明显的错误需要改正的吗。谢谢了。

alice-home

楼主先做基本修改，起码把低级语法错误先解决了才好看一点啊。看了第一句就看不下去了。

kreuz777

Abstract

Operational risk is becoming one of the main risks that our financial institution facing in recent years. Frequently major cases in banking industry which involve amazing amount of people and amount cause a strong social reaction. After a painful lesson, operational risk is taken more and more seriously, whilst supervision departments pay utmost attention to the way in preventing and reducing operational risk of China’s banking industry.

However in relation to credit risk and market risk, currently the research on operational risk is still in initial stages of development. With the vigorous development of China’s banking industry, which integrated with the international banking industry, it is necessary to strengthen the supervision of operational risk management on commercial bank

Analyzing from the major banking industry cases couple years, such operational risk centers mainly in primary department, as well as the Bank of China which I work for. The prevention and control of operational risk become the top priority of every commercial bank nowadays because of the wide products and nets of primary department. As the operation of risk management in primary department, it is particular important to learn from the idea to the advanced international banking operating in the concept of risk management, and further to innovate in management in corporation of the domestic environment.

先放一点。。。还是要请教各位，实在不是对翻译很专业，很多中文的谦辞觉得和英文很不一样。。希望大家给些意见和建议。。。觉得怎么翻才比较好呢。

y12345678

这里大家只能给你的语法句式提点意见，专业术语你还得自己去查

你可以试试cnki的术语词典，看看别人是咋说的
http://dict.cnki.net/
不过切记cnki里的有很多中式英语，查到的关键词还得放到英文的学术数据库对比一下
比如说可以去Social Sciences Citation Index之类的看看摘要

[ 本帖最后由 y12345678 于 2009-4-2 14:57 编辑 ]